The Old Spirit

I've come to the acquaintance of someone that's extraordinary. We have talked over an hour or so, and in that time, this gentleman has shown me that he deserves to be called extraordinary. Why? It seems little time to have such a certainty over someone. It was enough, though, to realize that he has that old spirit most of us have as children, and that so few keep as they grow up. A willing to learn, eyes that shine has new stuff is brought to his knowledge, and the humanity to share it.

This guy, a man in his 50's with a respectable belly, is a teacher that struggles to keep his students motivated and provide them with experiences that will constitute tools in their lives, professional and private. Although he has little experience in some areas, he steals time from his family and friends to find out how stuff works, and bring it to his students. This man has a heart that moved me, and that put a shine in my eyes for having found another soul that shares the same interests I do.

Lack of support from the school board, unmotivated students and constantly being mistreated by the education ministry has made many teachers throw the towel and lower their arms. I sensed a different fiber in this man. And for that, he seems to be one of the heroes that wander around unnoticed by most, and that do make a difference.

I have had teachers like that, some have made a lasting impression in me, and a few of those have become good friends. And those have added something to my life, important things. Things that were more than academic knowledge, things that are part of the man I am today.

They say that the difference between a child and a man is the cost of their toys. The Chinese wish their friends that they live in interesting times. Well, in all of mankind's history, there probably were no more interesting times than the ones we live now. We are only bored if we chose to be. Our lives are so surrounded by knowledge, the access to it has probably never been so easy, that what limits us is basically lack of interest due to lack of imagination.

I can't deny my will to help this man achieve his goals. I would have no reward other than my own satisfaction in achieving new knowledge and helping someone getting ahead. I think I will probably dig in my old projects and find out if some of them are interesting and simple enough for the students. Hopefully, we can make something of it, and just maybe... someone else gets a shine in their eyes. After all, Xmas is the time to expect small miracles. Could it be that I can manage to give a present to a man that devotes his live to sharing knowledge? Once I thought that a smile was my reward for offering someone a gift. Now I see that I was a bit off. What you really give is a reason to smile, and the smile is the gift you present others.

Never mind if you are loaded with money, or your wallet is dry as a bone. Happiness is something that bypasses material possessions, if you are not materialistic yourself.

My GF likes to offer presents and she lives Xmas as a time of joy. I myself, am more discrete. What really gives me pleasure is to sit by the fire, playing chess over a nice conversation and a glass of red wine. To gather the people we love under one roof and enjoy each other. It's not about the presents or the food. It's about family and love. And first of all, I need to feel that. After, the rest might be welcome, but the essential has to come first.

Have a happy Xmas everybody, and keep fanning the flames of that old spirit.

Doing the right thing

Sometimes you are held to a stop by little things that happen in your life. Something that makes you think. You count your blessings and sometimes you get scared by the possibility of losing them.
The wonderful people that light your world, the comfort level you have achieved, the laughter time and space that you share with your loved ones.

If you consider the possibility of a life ending, and how it will affect all around that person, they will suffer with the loss as much as that person filled their lives. The hole is always as big as what you pull out.

Knowing that the people you love will suffer when you fade away someday, you might think that if you are as neutral as possible, they wont miss you as much. Not true. People will still remember you, if not for the good things, for the bad then.
They will still miss how much of a pain in the ass you used to be, how grouchy you could be, the stupid remarks you made and the bad calls you took. No matter what, we all make impacts in others lives.

As far as I can tell, the best choice is to let it all go natural. Being fun and being there for others, knowing how to laugh at yourself, experiencing and sharing together, sitting down and talking things over, having a special someone that you can pour your heart out to.

All this came from a movie I caught in the middle, not seeing the tittle. It's a great family movie, with an old man faced with it's eminent death due to cancer. That halts the whole family and causes an introspection over everyone's lives, the choices they all made, and leads to a general redemption. Having been a family that always dealt with problems by making jokes, they finally sit down and talk. So this man's announced final hour manages more that what they all expected. He changes his behavior, and starts fooling around, just having fun, and dragging his family with him. And probably the most important phrase in the movie is said by this old man on the verge of death: “It's not a sin to die... and neither is living”.

So we shouldn't be afraid to live, although in some cases it happens. We shouldn't be afraid of dieing, although sometimes it happens too. Guess what, being afraid is not a sin either. What might be considered a sin is that you don't give yourself to others, don't share joy's and worries, don't do for others what would be nice if someone did for you. In short, be a friend.

Everyone important to you should start out as being a friend. And they should never go beyond that status. Parents, uncles, girlfriend, wife... all that really matters is if they are your friends. From that, you can build a part of your happiness.

In closure, the right thing is not hiding from the world so that in case it all goes wrong, people wont get hurt. The right thing is to be a part of the big party of life, laughing your ass off, sharing and being forgiving.

A final word: don't be afraid of being ridiculous sometimes. We all are from time to time, and knowing how to deal with that helps you not taking yourself too seriously, which leads to good humor. Otherwise, you will never be as happy as you could have been, and your legacy will be somewhat... grouchy.

Cornered

Something happens when you are cornered into some messy situation. Now, I'm talking about the kind of situation where you have nothing to lose. I've seen it happen often to other people, and I was in the same kind of situation just over 2 years ago.

At the time, I didn't even had a home to live in. I wasn´t living on the street due to family help. With a mother and a sister I felt where my responsability to take care of, the strugle within was enormous. I felt like I had to carve a way through the jungle with one hand and pull them with the other, trying to keep us together. To make things worse, I was trapped in a course that was nearly over, after 2 years of studying. I would lose my diploma if I quited, and I was in desperate need for money.

I was lucky enough to have people that helped me out. It's Xmas and I'm thinking of people that don't have such luck. What if I was one of those people back then?

I struggled as far as I could, made all kind of efforts, and now I have a little more to show for. The kind of obligations I commited myself to, keep me working to maintain and get ahead. But taking two steps back in my memories, I remember another time when I couldn't accept failure, simply because it wasn't an option. I had commited to the most important person in my life, and I had to honour her sacrifice. And I did what seemed impossible to me at the time. I set my own pace, burned up my eye lashes studying as hard as I could. I made it happen. And it made me feel special. I knew then that I was able to do things. More importantly, I had proven myself capable.

I was just watching Oprah, and some stories came up about people that had lost everything. I'm not talking about a bank account. It's actually loosing everything, and still be found in a huge debt. What do you do when you find yourself in that kind of situation, a woman with 2 kids to take care of? This was the most moving case presented. Wanna know what happens? Everything changes perspective. You sacrifice every little thing that most of us take for granted. Being with your kids becomes a luxury that you sometimes can't have. You love them so much that you sacrifice energies and time with them to provide for them. Like my mother did when I needed help. Like I did for her when she needed some solid ground. When we suceed, we suceed together. Until then, we are cornered together and fighting for a way out. Even when you feel cornered, love for life or for someone else will get you through. All we need is to keep believing, and at the end of each day, count our blessings so we never forget how lucky we actually are.